Friday, June 25, 2004

lucky me

here i am, sitting on a bench in Bournemouth Square. just sitting here sipping hot chocolate and just enjoying the warm sun and the cool breeze. it's a nice weather today. for the past few days, i've been freezing my ass off and wondered where the hell was summer. i have to adjust to the climate here. i HAVE to, cause i'm staying here for three years. everyone says i'm lucky for being here, well, in a way, it is true. i'll be studying here for three years and get paid for doing it. for this first three months, i'm just studying simple, dull english. so, it's more like a three month vacation really. then the real studying starts.

after my course, i will have a good career with a REALLY nice pay. while i'm here, i get to taste new food. i get to meet new people from all over Europe. i get to experience new things that i can't back at home like going clubbing, hang out at parks, go to real concerts and go to pubs. but am i really lucky? if you just think about those positives things, then yeah, i'm one lucky bastard. but you're forgetting one thing - i'm sham...there's always a downside. when something good happens to me, there's always a catch. whether it'd be something bad happens to me or maybe i wake up after that or i have to make a sacrifice for it. this time, it was the latter. i had to make a sacrifice...a big one. for being here, i had to leave my family, my sister (a person whom i can't live without..i love you and i miss you so much sis), my friends (they are my world..can't imagine my life without them) and her (my everything..my reason) my life was fine. perfect even! everything was coming together. my dream was actually a reality. i was truly happy. but no, i had to have drama in my life.

like any TV drama, a simple boy meets girl but girl rejects. but in the end, girl likes boy and boy still likes girl just won't do. it'd be too dull for the viewer. there has to be a twist. there's always a twist. the 'producers' of my life must've thought that me getting a chance of a life time and had to leave immediately just when things got started was an excellent episode for the 'show'. "eveything happens for a reason..." i hate the crappy quote! it's an excuse for everything that happens, good or bad! so what do you think will happen to me next?! tune in next week's show! SHAM the LUCKIEST UNLUCKY MAN! sigh...